I eventually fell asleep, somewhere in the middle of my rumination on my failures. And, with the unfinished business in my mind, it greeted me the next morning. But this time, having a night of rest, I had the questions ready:
“Why? Why did I classify those things as failures? Why did my lack of grand accomplishments make me think that I got nothing done? And even if I had a whole day where I got nothing done – why in the world does that matter? At what point in time did I start believing that I am the sum of my accomplishments, my production, instead of who I am, and Whose I am?”
Because, in fact, I did get some things done: I fed my children, made sure they were all hugged and kissed and assured of love before they headed out the door for school. I worked at my office job, doing exactly what I was hired to do. I had a sweet text conversation with a friend I haven’t seen face to face in awhile. I made dinner that fuels my family and had simple conversations as we sat around the dinner table. I prayed with our kids as we tucked them into bed and once again, assured them of my love. I sat on the couch with my husband as he fell asleep on my shoulder, exhausted from his day. So, no, I didn’t do anything that that made a difference in the grand scheme of things. But I did do things that mattered.
And I’m guessing you did, too.
“Our value does not lie in what we do, but in Whose we are.”
We live in a world that glorifies the grand and the big and the amazing. Strangers that become Youtube sensations and a neighbors that writes a book that reaches the #1 best seller list and seemingly random people who make a Facebook video and it goes viral. All of these things happening to normal everyday people make it feel like it’s possible for all of us. So, when it doesn’t, it can leave us feeling like if we aren’t grand we aren’t anything.
What a lie. We are humans made in the image of the One True God. We were chosen above all other creatures to live in this world and rule it. To create, to love, to share His goodness. Perhaps a few of us were called to lead thousands, but most of us are called to lead a few. Even if those few have sticky hands, endless jabber, and eyes that reflect our genes. Our numbers do not matter, but our faithfulness does.
Friend, if you struggle with this like I do, can we remind each other of who we are instead of what we do? Can we also remember to remind others of this as well? Because, if we are struggling with this, no doubt others are as well. Our value does not lie in what we do, but in Whose we are.
This week, find a way to remind yourself of that. Maybe it’s a scripture verse that cuts through the lies – post it where you can see it daily. Or perhaps it’s a real conversation with a trusted friend who can keep you accountable to the person you are and not what you do. May we find rest from our production, thinking our value lies in it, and instead relish the joy of knowing we are someone because of our Creator, and who He made us to be: His.