Despite the sweet voices coming from the back seat, the new day dawning, and the fragrant coffee, I still feel dark. I don’t know why this cloud keeps following me around. I don’t want it. I haven’t asked it to stay.
As I stare through the windshield a song comes on the radio. The words catch me and I turn it up:
Hope sleeps without me
Her sweet dreams surround me,
But I’m left out
I’ll need a fix now
To believe, to feel
These rooms are dark now
These halls are hollow,
And so am I
She is hard to find now
I won’t turn to dust now
Let these tears rust now on my face
Give me the spark now
Hope is what we crave, and that will never change
So I stand and wait
I need a drop of grace to carry me today,
A simple song to say
It’s written on my soul:
Hope’s what we crave
Hope is What We Crave by For King and Country
Hope. Oh, I want to hope. But I am scared. I feel the stretch between pessimism and optimism. Hoping for things to improve but kinda, sorta feeling like the next hammer is going to fall any minute.
But I feel inclined to hope, like I am tentatively walking out on a shaky bridge. Taking one little baby step at a time. Each time my foot moves forward, pausing for a moment to see if the bridge will hold.
A bit of hope sparks, my spirits rise a little, each time the bridge holds true.
But what if it breaks? What if, the small hopes I have begun to build up, come crashing back down? Then I’m going to need Someone to save me, to rescue me from that fall. Thankfully I have a Savior who said He would do just that.
And, as I continue to remind myself, the hopes of this life are temporary and fleeting. But hope in my Savior will last, and nothing can take that away.
It can be very difficult to get out of that pit of discouragement. But, I have found something that can give a bit of a foothold to get us that much closer to the top: HOPE.
It doesn’t magically happen, we have to be intentional about seeking it out. Scripture, prayer, a long talk with a wise friend. All of these things can give us glimpses of hope. Glimpse of the promise that things aren’t always going to be this way. If we place our trust in a Savior that secures our future for us, we have the very best kind of hope out there.
May you find bits of this hope in your life this week. Keep intentionally pushing onward – there are better days coming.
I have hope in that.